the other night as i was falling a sleep i had a sense of panic rush over me.
i asked garrett if he locked the bad guys out.
"yes"
both of them?
"yes. all of them"
(this seems to happen every night. and by both of them i mean both locks. not both bad guys)
i continued to try and fall asleep and then i realized the panic was from what i was thinking about before i asked about the bad guys.

here's the thing.
i married a very, very,VERY talented man.
which is great. on most days.
he writes, does slam poetry, plays music, writes rock operas, and christmas programs, has the most unique voice most people have ever heard, is so kind and sincere, and honestly the list goes on and on.
he is good at any thing and everything he tries. and the first time too.
and his hobbies keep us busy.

today i said "i dont know what i want to do right now."
naturally he suggested "write a rock opera."
like it aint no thing.

this is why i was panicking as i was trying to fall asleep:

1. i realized i no longer have any hobbies.
since school and work have consumed my life for the past 5 years i didnt have time to have hobbies.
i always had a job through college and seemed to always be taking 14-19 credits per semester.
i felt guilty if i did something such as a hobby  instead of spending that time studying.

2. (and my biggest concern)
our kids are going to realize how talented garrett is and say "mom, what can YOU do?!"
and i will have no answers.

so ive been hobby searching.
luckily, this great city of salt lake has lots of opportunists.
im going to try and attend workshops such as a paper flower making class and a cross stitching class.
im currently in the market for a key board so i can bring back some piano skills i once had.
im going to try some new recipes.
maybe take up knitting.
basically at this point, im willing to try anything.
plus, only having a job and not going to school leaves my evenings free.
so i actually have time for fun hobbies!!